My book is out. (Pause for confetti tossing in the air.)

It is actually not officially due out until the 22nd but the local store has gotten their copies and amazon is shipping and Powells shows it in their remote warehouse and available for online ordering so I think it is safe to say that my book is out. I actually signed the first few copies the other day at the local store and that was very cool. So I did it, I wrote a book and I got an agent and my agent sold it to a very good publisher and the publisher has gotten my book into the stores. After all these years, I made it this far. And now, well, now that's pretty much it.

The Millions had a piece up last week about self-published authors and I thought it was interesting how many of them commented about the work they had to do marketing their books and how that was one aspect of traditional publishing they missed. I don't disagree with the work they have to do but really, I don't see much difference between their situation and my own. The only thing I have going for me is the cachet that an actual publisher gives me - it certainly removes any bias that a bookstore or reviewer might have against self-published authors from our conversations. But as far as traditional publishing helping me get the word out on my book - well, that has not happened. In fact, very little has happened in that regard at all.

My publisher has sent out lots of press releases to all the traditional newspapers and magazines - to a long list of publications that we thought would be especially interested in The Map of My Dead Pilots. We targeted outdoorsy publications, aviation ones, regional ones, etc. There has been no response from any of them, not one. I also sent out my own letters with postcards both of the book cover and cool AK flying pics hoping that might help. Nothing. I can understand no response from the bigger publications (although it is still frustrating how many of them will write exaggerated articles about Alaska flying but not even request a review copy of a book about someone who was actually involved in the profession) (Grrrr) but we have received no response from even the Anchorage Daily News or ALASKA magazine. The only thing I can figure is that they all ignore most of what they get - both in the mail and electronically and as someone who receives many book review requests every single day I can understand that. But what do I do about this for my book? How do I break through and get heard? At this point, I just don't know.

There is less money out there to promote books like mine (mid list debut author) and more noise to compete against. Not only are there still the high dollar books sucking all the marketing oxygen out of the room (this will never change) but now there are a million self-published authors sending out emails on their indy publications and they are filling up inboxes left and right as well. I have not even gotten a response from emails to bookstores in Western Washington and Oregon. Not from indy bookstores, not from B&N, not from university bookstores. Not one response from my carefully worded email that provides a brief description of my book, a mention of my starred Booklist review (the only formal review I have received), a bit about my background and links to my web site with more info on the book. It's a good letter - I've been reading these from other authors long enough to know it is a good letter - but it has been universally ignored. Again, I assume because there are so many people bombarding bookstores that they just aren't interested unless they know you personally. (I have talked to folks in person - and every single time received business cards for the person to contact via email about my book. And thus into the black hole I fall.) (At this point it is actually getting pretty funny.)

The only people who have agreed to write about my book are people I know and I appreciate that - you would not believe how much I appreciate that - but at this point I am also getting very realistic. My book is out there in a very big ocean and there is little to nothing that can be done to make it more visible to the book-buying public. I have one local event scheduled on December 3rd (hosted by my local indy at the public library) and I am now sending out emails to schools to see if they are interested in having me in as a speaker. (Primarily colleges with aviation programs.) I will drag my high-Alaska-flight-time husband along with me and put on my presentation and we will talk about Alaska aviation and show pictures and do our best to entertain anyone who listens. It is clear to me that this is going to be one reader at a time, one book sale at a time, one long year of trying to gain notice. But again, that's only if anyone responds to this new round of emails.

Somehow, in the midst of all this, I am supposed to still be a writer but now on something new, and still run a small business and still do all those other things that we all do. And I'm supposed to do this because this is just how it is now, this is what it is like for the average 21st century author. The question I'm weighing - seriously weighing - is if it is worth it. Is this life, where you feel overlooked and underappreciated and sometimes just flat out angry, the life I want to have? Did I expect a NYTimes best seller? No - please. But I expected just one - just one - response from all those emails and mailings. So I have to think long and hard about where I go from here and how far on this road I'm interested in traveling now that I know how lonely it gets.

Do I really want to start writing something new? While most writers will tell you they write because they must, well, we must also clean our closets and put our photo albums together and there is always blogging and reviewing. I can just do those things. Is it a worthwhile endeavor to write a book when you must then spend so much time and energy to sell it - or be rebuffed on a daily basis while trying to sell it? I don't know the answer to that question. I am glad that MAP was written and is out there - if only for the guys I flew with if nothing else. But is this something I want to do again?

I don' t know. I truly just do not know.

UPDATE: And now some good news - but in another post. But I wanted to let you guys know there is some good news and all is not lost and I am feeling [moderately] hopeful. It's a long slog, it's going to be a crazy long slog, but there are TWO events scheduled now and a regional magazine interested in reviewing and an ad buy from my pub for ALASKA magazine. All of that is good and helpful. More soon!